I mean, shopping for swimsuits is not fun in the best of times. Especially for hippy or large-chested women. But. I could find a swimsuit when I was hippy and large-chested, even if my husband was not allowed to watch me put it on because it sounded like I was applying a rubber hose to my body and it was squeaky and hilarious.
But I got it on, and it fit, and it made me look good! If not a little tired from all the effort to get it on.
Now? Swimsuits for women who have chosen to go flat do not exist.
Unless you want to wear a Speedo suit like they use in competitions. No. I have hips. I have legs. My stomach is still a work in progress since a full removal of all reproductive bits. And my chest is flat. Flat, flat.
I need a swimsuit. I have things coming up that I might want to swim. Or at least look like I want to swim.
What to do?
I’m working on a Frankensuit. Bottoms are easy. I’ve found many options of cute skirts and leggings or regular swimsuit bottoms, shorts. Got it. No problem.
Tops? Yeah. No. They all have cups in them or forms or something. I don’t want anything. Mastectomy suits? Higher lines to hide your scars! Cups for your prosthetics! I don’t wear prosthetics. I don’t want to.
Does it make people uncomfortable that women might choose to go flat and not worry about wearing anything to approximate a breast? Why? I am not interested in prosthetics. It is a personal choice and I support whatever choice someone makes. I wish swimsuit manufacturers felt the same.
So, well, I guess I’ll be buying a men’s swim top! Sizing could be interesting, and I don’t really want one with tight short sleeves. Maybe tight long sleeves? Or a t-shirt type?
I can be 50% cute, I guess. Assuming I can find a cute bottom.
I’m not taking this personally. I know from reading comments that I’m not the only one with this issue. It’s very outside of the realm of many peoples’ understanding of the world that someone would choose a flat chest over reconstruction or prosthetics. I get it.
But it doesn’t make it any easier or less frustrating. Although… I could just swim topless. No nipples, no problem! Oh! Am I making you uncomfortable? Guess what is way more uncomfortable than your opinion of my body!
Cancer. Cancer treatment. Needles and drugs that change your body in ways that just suck. Decisions about a surgery that has no good answers. None of us will ever be the same no matter how small or large our surgery was or what kind of treatment we went through.
I do hope everyone has a good summer and gets to wear a cute swimsuit. Really. I’ll report back on what I come up with!